Mental health during lock-down
Introduction by CEO, AKA C1
This piece of writing has been written by one of our Muddy participants. In mid March, as a result of COVID 19, NHS support services were either completely pulled or significantly reduced for several of our participants. This included mental health support services and additional services such as support during opioid withdrawal. As a result of these reduced services, Muddy Care is playing an enhanced importance in the lives of our participants and we are now operating seven days a week.
Muddy Care had implemented a daily monitoring protocol immediately from when we had to suspend our activity programme. The benefits of doing this were immediate and this is the story of our ‘red’ participant, meaning they came to a point where they could no longer cope alone and intervention from other services had to be implemented.
It takes courage and honesty to write this and our participant wrote this to not only tell her story but to help others in a similar situation. We encourage our participants to be authentic and honest and this piece of writing is exactly that.
Thank you for sharing this.
Mental health during lock-down
Written by a Muddy Care participant
Living in a lock-down is something that no one has ever experienced before and everyone is struggling with it, whether it be from increased anxiety, fear, sadness or frustration, but for people who suffer from mental illness these feelings are intensified.
I have experienced an increase in my anxiety since the lock-down has been put in place, as well as intense feelings of hopelessness and of being overwhelmed. Normally when I feel like this I would ring my CPN and arrange to see her the next day, so that I could get the support I need from the mental health services, but seeing people in person is now no longer possible. This is one of the things that I struggled with most, as I rely on seeing my CPN and consultants to help me manage my mental and physical health conditions, but as I can no longer do this, I am having to try and manage my conditions myself.
I fully understand the reasons for the lock-down and social distancing, but for people with mental health conditions who have been receiving face-to-face support for many years, this sudden withdrawal in support can feel overwhelming. This is how I felt when it all began. I was completely overwhelmed with the whole situation. I didn’t know how I would cope without seeing my support team. I felt I had no one to turn to if I needed help and support and it led to me falling into a crisis. Luckily for me a Muddy friend rang me when I was at my worse. It really helped to talk to her and be able to tell her how I was feeling and to say that I just didn’t know what to do. She encouraged me to ring the duty mental health nurse and to tell my partner how bad I was feeling. I did both of these things and the next day my CPN rang me and we had our appointment over the phone. A phone appointment is not the same as seeing someone in person, but it is better then nothing. She was able to reassure me by saying that she is not leaving me, that she will ring me once a week for our appointments and that I am able to ring duty whenever I feel I need to talk to someone. Knowing that I still have some form of mental health support really helped to calm me down and to feel that I am not alone. But I know that not everyone is as lucky as me, to have weekly support over the phone. I know several people who have had no contact with their CPN for weeks and almost everyone has had their outpatient appointments cancelled, for both physical and mental health conditions.
The self-isolation and social distancing really made an impact on me when I was admitted to A&E a couple of weeks ago. I had been experiencing symptoms of the coronavirus and it was affecting my heart. I rang the coronavirus advice line and because of my underlying health conditions I was told I needed to go to hospital. My partner drove me there, but once I arrived he was not allowed to come in with me. I was took onto the isolation ward and put into my own room, where I was completely on my own. I couldn’t see anything except the four white walls of my room. There was no one for me to talk, to distract me or take my mind off what was happening. The doctors, who were in full protective equipment, would come into my room to do tests, but they would be in and out as quickly as possible and I was left laying in my bed wondering what was going to happen. This was an extremely surreal and difficult situation, especially experiencing it all by myself but somehow I was able to remain calm and I was able to get some form of support from friends and family over the phone. Luckily, I was able to go home later that evening. This experience really highlighted for me how important it is to have someone you can feel you can turn to when you need help and how much it easier it is to go through difficult situations when you share it with another person as without it people can feel that they are unable to cope.
I am part of a group called Muddy Care, a community organisation for people with chronic conditions. Since the pandemic all of our meetings and activities have been cancelled, but we have been supporting each other through our online daily group chats and phone calls. These chats are really important to all of us involved in Muddy Care as we have become very close and a real community in every sense of the word since we started the education rehabilitation programme in September 2019. We are able to talk to each other daily and to be honest with each about how we are feeling. This is much more difficult with people who do not have chronic conditions as our ‘specialness’ is very difficult to understand and comprehend unless you are experiencing the chronic condition journey yourself. Our CVs often include multiple medical trauma experiences, live changing challenges and consequences that are beyond reasonable with no cure in our sights. Through Muddy Care we are able to help and support each other and talking about how we are feeling helps to reassure us all that we are not alone and that what we are all experiencing is normal, due to these extraordinary circumstances.
My mental health support is essential and has become an integral part of my life just as my physical consultant appointments have for my physical chronic conditions. However, what has become abundantly clear during lockdown is the importance of supporting one another and being their for one another and how different forms of support can all help us in the collective sense. Whether that is through NHS health and medical professionals or through professional third party organisations such as Muddy Care, we all need to work and help, support and be there for one another.